Limerick Contest


If you made it to the last page of The Concrete Vineyard, you are aware of my book giveaway contest. The top 3 entries will receive signed paperback copies (1st print edition, only 250 available) along with handwritten notes from my manuscript. Entries must be received by December 31, 2021. If you submit an entry (and it is word appropriate (see below)), I will post it here with credit given to its author.

Although there is some profanity in my novel, a good dirty limerick is actually devoid of these overt exclamations.

There once was a man from Nantucket” is the opening line for many limericks, in which the name of the island of Nantucket creates often ribald rhymes and puns. The protagonist in the obscene versions is typically portrayed as well-endowed and hypersexualized. The opening line is so well known that it has been used as a stand-alone joke, implying upcoming obscenities.

The Challenge:

If you believe you can better the last 3 lines of my limerick, please make your submission to my contact page:

My Submission:

“There once was a man from Toronto;
Who was ready to drop his drawers pronto;

Caroline Simcoe was full game;
For she enjoyed much the same;
That’s why they mounted the hood of his Bronco.”

Your Submission:

“There once was a man from Toronto;
Who was ready to drop his drawers pronto;

Alternatively, if you can create your own 5 line limerick that uses characters or subject matter from my novel, I would wholeheartedly welcome your submission. Depending on the number of submissions, I may need to create another category.

Happy rhyming!